Word of the Week – descolgado

Teléfono rojo descolgadoYes, yes, I know that descolgado isn´t exactly a major lexical revelation to most people who have been learning Spanish for a while.  We´ve all left the phone off the hook – or we did when phones had hooks.

No, my Word of the Week and the one I´ll be monkey-wrenching into conversations for at least seven days is an “old” word in what, for me, is a new context.

Picture it.   I´m at the pool in my faded, nine-year old, fushcia, fuchia, fuck ….. pink bikini.  (Actually, don´t picture it.  Only Wes Craven is fully-qualified for that).

 

Oh no! Not Mo at the pool!

Oh no! Not Mo at the pool!

 

Anyway,  I was having an intimate chat by the pool with one of my favourite neighbours.  We´ve lived up the same “close” for ten years but I don´t know her name and she doesn´t know what country I´m from.

¡Qué grande está tu hija!, the affable lady exclaimed, as she always does when she coincides with Malassie who at this point was sitting on the grass.  The last time they coincided Malassie had let me put a sticky-out dress on her.

A while back.

Mija, drawing daggers at the two, dithery old fogies perusing her, one of them her Mum, is on the edge of that very Spanish phenomenon, the pandilla.

 

Panditas

Panditas

 

You´ll know by now that, contrary to appearances, this term has nothing to do with young, Asian bears but is a group of noisy, rude, gesticulating, cursing, acting-like-I´m-Justin Bieber/Shakira, twelve year old boys and girls flirting unashamedly in a public place.

Since talking about one´s kids is the número uno topic for women here,  I launched into an explanation as to why Malassie was perched prettily and rather primly on the outside edge of the towel-strewn, ten-strong pandilla settlement.

Well, she´s got a couple of good pals at school but they don´t seem to want to come to the pool orthehouseordoanythingandsoI´mtryingtogethertomakenewfriends…..

Bloody hell!  So difficult to explain that Malassie´s school pals are unavailable, for reasons unknown, over the summer so she needs new ones.

But my neighbour, older, wiser, nicer and rather more (totally) Spanish than me said,

“Se ha quedado descolgada.”

SHE´S BEEN LEFT HANGING!

She has, she has (barely stifled sob)!  That´s exactly what´s happened.  Thank you, native speaker!

But by now Malassie´s edging her way into the pandilla, not an easy endeavour for a shy girl.  Fortunately, there´s a nice girl who´s amazed that Malassie´s bilingual and a hot boy ……

….. so, she won´t be descolgada for long.

Colgado por ti

And now I really have to start worrying about her being colgada ….

In love!

That truly IS horrific!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SpainStuff

I like this video  by Aleix Saló (previously posted) for many reasons. Firstly, because of its casual and sarcastic tone – very socarrón.   I´m also quite taken by the map figure of Spain … though it reminds me a little of the odious Spongebob Squarepants.

I like how Saló plays with the ideas of progress (associated with English) and backwardness (associated with Spanish), as well as the suffix “stan,” signifying underdevelopment, though people from countries such as Afghanistan might take offence and probably quite rightly.

However, the focus is firmly on Spain, the country associated with the big, savage, macho toro, except that now the raging bull has been replaced by cows, and not the fattened ones, but vacas flacas in this crisis of biblical proportions.

The argument is quite simple – or at least Saló makes it so for economic illiterates like myself.  After a fantastic, macho party (un festón padre) in which the Aznar government sold off rustic (not to mention “protected”) land for urbanization, creating a property boom, Spain´s now got a huge, economic hangover, since as night follows day, the bust has shown up.

Why?

Debt.  As Antonio has kindly clarified in the post´s comments section,  la tía de la lejía, the Bleach Lady, who comes from the future to help harassed housewives get the stains out of their whites, came to the rescue of grubby Spain, in the form of Debt (or Dettol?) to wash away the sins of the Dictadura, blanquear (launder) ill-gotten gains and elevate the humble, muddy Spanish shepherd to shiny Lamborghini of God status.

Who wouldn´t want that?

But debt is a have now, pay later phenomenon, theft from the future.  And the future is now here.  So the usual suspects, namely, the self-preserving banks, their ruling class allies and their hangers-on, who never lose, are clawing back as much money as they can.  (Wankia, with The Rat jumping off the sinking ship, is a prime example).

 

Shouldn´t that be the middle finger?

Shouldn´t that be the middle finger?

 

Meanwhile, kids who rushed out of school right into the construction industry are now undereducated, unemployed, losing their homes and still in debt. Their role model was Francisco Hernando, a.k.a. Paco el Pocero, who worked himself up from extreme poverty as a sewer worker or pocero (from pozo, well or pit) to become one of the richest entrepreneurs in Spain thanks to el ladrillo, construction, in the process described in Salo´s video.

Francisco Hernando

While I have sympathy for any impoverished person who creates a better life for him or herself, the traditional business culture in Spain, all too often based on dodgy practices, means that this illiterate and possibly well-intentioned “Robin Hood” was, in fact, a crook exemplifying a model of progress that´s out of step with one based on innovation, meritocracy and sustainability.

That´s me out then, I guess…

 

The macho pelotazo model, best described as the achievement of an aim by slapping it into submission with a big pairs of balls, evidently is no solution to anything. When Spanish governments realise that running the country con un par de cojones is, in fact ruining the country, Spain might be a fit place to prosper in.

Saló´s video also highlights one of the supposed Seven Deadly Sins of Spain, la envidia.  I hadn´t noticed this being much different from anywhere else but many people have commented on it to me and it is, of course, debatable.

 

In any case,

“Hágale morir de envidia a su cuñado y cómprese un adosado,”

we hear.   Have your brother-in-law die of jealousy and buy yourself a semi-detached,” or chalé, as opposed to the cramped little flat that most people can afford.  All risk-free, too, because if you can´t keep up the payments, sell it, make a profit and get tax breaks since the price of property never falls.

No need for the government to invest the profits in I+D+I, Investigación y Desarrollo e Innovación (Research and Development) since the pelotazo model seems to be working just fine.

Well, the value  of property fell, leaving people not only in negative equity but unable to pay the letra, or cuota, mortgage payment, even if they were still employed on a crap salary, a sueldo de mierda.  For these Spaniards still in a job – after all, somebody has to keep the country running, even the elite knows that – their rights are now being slashed virtually to 19th C. levels.

So this is actually a very depressing video – except for the language!  And the most fun phrase used in it is the quite disgusting a tomar por culo. 17 years in a Spanish department failed to expose me to this phrase.  Straight off the plane in ´97, however, I heard it all around me.

What the hell did it mean? And how the hell to use it right?

el tomarse de culo, tomar de culo, tomarse por el culo….?

No, it´s much simpler than that.  It´s not a reflexive verb requiring the use of the participle se.  It has no need of the definite article, el, though the full and unnecessary version of the phrase uses it, plus  the verb ir, to go, as in véte a tomar por el culo.

Literally, this is an invitation to take something up the backside, to put it nicely. Translated it means to “stuff”, in the sense of “Stuff Rodrigo Rato.”

But we don´t need all that grammatical palaver to use it.  All you need is a tomar por culo plus a subject, plus a lot of exclamation marks.

Stuff him

No further stuffing required

For example:

¡A tomar por culo las ardillas! Stuff squirrels!

¡A tomar por culo Risto Mejide! Stuff Risto Mejide!*

¡A tomar por culo SpainStruck! Stuff SpainStruck! (Noooooooooo!!!)

Having said this, if, like me, you often take a scunner to certain phrases, you can substitute saco for culo.  While I can´t quite get a visual on a tomar por saco, I´d probably prefer to use it.

Well, I´ve struggled with this blog post for a while now and have decided to give up on it.  It´s just going to peter out now …..no more handy phrases,  no advice, no pithy comments, no conclusion, nothing, nada, except to say that *Risto Mejide is the detested Simon Cowell-type figure on the Spanish version of Britain´s Got Talent called Tú sí que vales.

That´s it.

Stuff this blog post.

¡A tomar por culo esta entrada!

 

 

Sexism and Spanish

cuatro mujeres de Dios

As I promised – though I´m now heart-sorry I did, since I´m not qualified for the  subject – here are some further thoughts on Spanish as a sexist language.

Keeping in mind Kaley´s accurate contention that languages aren´t sexist, people are, I do want to argue that Spanish encapsulates sexist elements that should be changed.

 

Some linguists make very clear statements to this effect:

 ”Spanish leads the Romanc e languages in using derivatives of male kinship terms for female relatives” Source

So we have tío, tía, abuelo, abuela, hermano, hermana, and so on, when in French and Italian there are different words to designate the female, such as frère and soeur and fratello and sorella.

Since most nouns that were neuter in Latin came into Spanish as masculine nouns, these outnumber the feminine ones. The Roman Empire was a patriarchy (like most societies) in which women were, if not chattels, second-class citizens. This bias is, of course, reflected in language.

Scott Thornberry notes:

“That the masculine is the default form in Spanish accounts for all sorts of oddities, such as the fact that a parents’ association in Spain is una asociación de padres, even though the only people who attend are las madres.  Or that, when you walk up to a crowded stall in the market, you ask ¿Quién es el último? (Who’s the [masculine] last?), even if the bulk of those in line are women.”

Yet, given that language is, if nothing else, economical, doubling up won´t do. As I said in my last post, it´s redundant and long-winded to keep repeating ciudadanos y ciudadanasdelegados y delegadasniños y niñas, not to mention downright feo!

Something else to consider is the kind of substructure over which Latin was placed.   What influence did the Iberian languages have on how Latin was assimilated? I´d be interested to hear from linguists on this point (en casa del herrero ….).

A further point to consider is that language doesn´t exist in a vacuum but embedded into a complex  interplay of socio-cultural factors.  See, for example this quotation from grammarian of Spanish, M. Montrose Ramsay. His choice of nouns with which to illustrate his point betrays his own sexist bias:

“Names and designations of men, and the males of many animals, are masculine irrespective of termination:  el monarca, el cardenal, el cura, el centinela, el caballo, el león.  Similarly, designation of females are feminine:  la reina, la ninfa, la hurí, la lavandera, la vaca, la gallina”.

So men are monarchs, powerful clergy and strong, lion-hearted beasts and  women are (with the exception of the Queen, subjugated to the King) nymphs, houris, (sensual alluring women), scrubbers and cowardly, scatter-brained cows and hens!

This “lexical sexism”  is also reflected in many terms in Spanish that are positive when referring to males and negative when referring to females.

For example, and we know them already: un cualquiera is a guy, but una cualquiera is a prostitute (or woman regarded by men as not complying with her socio-sexual functions of virgin, wife and mother).

Un perro is “man´s” best friend (can´t a woman have a dog?) but una perra is, you guessed it, a whore.

 

Check out the fantastic book at the top of this post for other derogatory terms applied to women, apart from “Whore”. Written by Guy Bechtel and entitled, Las cuatro mujeres de Dios, it´s one of the best books on gender-bias that I ever read, discussing, as it does, the four kinds of woman contemplated by the Vatican – la puta, la bruja, la santa, and la tonta.  I´d add two more from personal experience, la loca (self-explanatory) and la guarra – the woman who doesn´t keep her house clean (read be a skivvy to a house full of men).

Perhaps the Real Academic Española is increasingly aware nowadays of the many sexist pitfalls in Spanish but their worries about the incorporation of “unnatural” elements to correct the sexist imbalance seems not to extend to anglicisms such as “overbooking,” – much less natural to Spaniards, never mind the thousands of Arab and French loan words throughout its history.

It is interesting, then, that Spaniards have felt the need to elaborate the non-sexist style guides to which Ignacio Bosque referred.  Yet, as I said in my last post, the recommendations are too extreme to be workable.

Here are some parodic examples written by Spaniards unhappy with extreme approaches.  Gorka Larrabeiti, writing at Rebelión offers this:

Lxs signxs ortográficxs libertarixs y la arroba de “ querid@s compañer@s” son subversivos sólo ortográficamente pero no afectan al sistema morfológico.

And Teresa de Santos has this proposal:

“Mi pripiisti

Il itri dii, primití ini pripiisti piri tirminir quin il priblimi dil sixismi in li linguii: Quiindi yi iri piquiñi, in mi piibli, jiguíbimis i isti jiigui: hiblir sili quin ini viquil. Iri mii divirtidi.”

Is this what we want?  Clearly not.   Not only do these examples impair intelligibility, but since language is made by speakers, not by decree, grammarians or idealogues, they wouldn´t work.

I think we have to remember that languages change slowly – over centuries – in symbiosis with society and that this debate is a healthy facet of the changing social roles of women in Spain since the Transición.

“Spain has already had one government half made up of women, the female sex is highly visible in most top professions, and the country is one of the most active in the world in campaigning against domestic violence”. Source

So, as with most things, sexism has to be challenged on all fronts, not just the linguistic one, and it can be done incrementally. My plan is to choose a few simple strategies to start wiping my Spanish clean of gender bias.

Here´s how.

  • If I hear something that seems feasible, I´ll use it. Years ago a vet described my cat as dominanta. I liked this a lot and used it but I was told that it didn´t exist in the feminine. Not yet, is the answer to that one!
  • If there´s a non-biased, collective noun that can avoid doubling up, I´ll use it.  So instead of ciudadanos y ciudadanas, I´ll use ciudadanía.
  • If there are more women in any gathering than men I´ll ditch the masculine default and use the feminine. So no more nosotros in a group of five women and one man. It´ll be nosotras from now on.  My hubby informs me he already uses  vosotras when addressing a group of people mainly comprised of women.
To conclude, if we want language – Spanish or any other one – to uphold the dignity of women we should all start to make some small changes today and maybe, just maybe, our daughters´ grand-daughters will speak, and be spoken about, in a language that respects them.

 

 

 

 

Sexy Spanish Languerie

Man in a corset

Unusual? Put a girl in it and it´ll look normal.

 

I´ve finally got round to reading the polemical article on sexism in the Spanish language that was recently published in El País.

Written by Ignacio Bosque, a linguist at the Real Academia Española (RAE) and signed by a further 26 RAE académicos, it cites nine official sets of guidelines on using non-sexist language prepared by universities, autonomous communities, unions, Town Halls and other institutions.

Criticising the fact that these guidelines have been created (throw up your hands in horror) without RAE input, Bosque asserts they are  unnatural for speakers of Spanish.

 

What can he mean, I wondered?

Then I read his hilarious example straight from the Constitution of that paradise of feminist freedom, Venezuela.

«Sólo los venezolanos y venezolanas por nacimiento … podrán ejercer los cargos de Presidente o Presidenta de la República, Vicepresidente Ejecutivo o Vicepresidenta Ejecutiva, Presidente o Presidenta y Vicepresidentes o Vicepresidentas de la Asamblea Nacional, magistrados o magistradas del Tribunal Supremo de Justicia, Presidente o Presidenta del Consejo Nacional Electoral, Procurador o Procuradora General de la República, Contralor o Contralora General de la República»…

Isn´t it fab?  Language rid of sexism by mere decretazo.  Now we women can parade about the shanties of  Caracas in our frillies in anti-Chavez torchlight processions without being kíl in de worl capital of ómisai.

¡Chévere! ¡Mujeres al poder!  It´s just a shame that the chavista policy of killing off the unrevolutionary, and furthermore unmanly, word “tumour” and replacing it with “lesions” isn´t being so successful, particularly when you´re getting them in your vergüenzas.

So, back to the article.  In essence the masculine generic is the only real issue Bosque studies.  Though he argues for equality for women, (yes, thank you, we´re really very grateful, now get to the point), his argument goes like this –

  1.  The “unmarked masculine”  los, todos, vosotros, nosotros, trabajadores, matemáticos, and millions more, subsumes and therefore makes invisible, the female subject in the generic masculine we (wee wee).
  2. This is a remnant of the times when women were excluded from everywhere but the semi-circlular mat in front of the kitchen sink.
  3. Yet this is now a mere linguistic fossil and that women shouldn´t feel excluded by it.

Skipping past the obvious fact that the RAE should button its collective lip on what women should or shouldn´t bloody-well feel, Spanish is, then, a language in which  “lo humano se confunde con lo masculino,” as  writer Laura Freixas has said in response to Bosque and his amorphous band of merry morphologists.

 

Silly scrubbing male in pink

Yeah, he wants to break free.

 

But the formula for avoiding this problem hasn´t been found.  Given the mindless approach of the República Bolivariana Venezolana above, I generally subscribe to Bosque´s approach,  particularly since the Junta de Andalucía, which has its own, piggy piece of Orwellian fascism, two legs good, four legs bad, actually proposes FINING people who refuse to employ its clumsy, redundant and – literally – unspeakable formula.

(I recall my hotel in Tetouan, Morocco, to be decked out in the Andalusian green and white stripes of the said Junta and the receptionist informing my nosy little self that a plane-load of these [now] linguistic Lone Rangers were off in the Rif mountains around Chefchaouen indulging in kif and putas).

Equality, anyone?

Offensive? Put a girl in it and it´ll look great!

 

Meanwhile Mexican writer Jordi Volpi makes the following observation:

“Ninguna lengua es inocente.  La española ..…tiene un matiz sexista inevitable, que está en el centro mismo de las estructuras gramaticales …. la lengua que utilizamos tiene muchos usos sexistas ….. viene la siguiente cuestión: ¿de estos, cuáles son modificables y cuáles no?

This is a much better proposition in my view.  What can we actually fix and do we need the RAE to do it for us?

I´ll tell you what I think in my next post and … what the feck´s a contralor or contralora anyway?

 

Feminism

 Now, cariño, put on the damn dress!